Writing helps me deal with overwhelming emotion. If you know me, I have a teakettle full some days just waiting to boil over.
There have been several paragraphs simmering in my brain for a long time. In the past three years, or maybe it’s only been two, I have lost three very influential people in my life. It’s coming up on Mother’s Day, so this post will only be about one of those three.
My brother asked me to speak at the wake. You know how people remember things about their loved ones. I couldn’t do it. I didn’t want to share anything about my mom and all of the things we shared over her lifetime.
But its Mother’s Day. And, being a mother myself, I would like my children to know just how much I miss her. There isn’t a day that I don’t think to myself, “I need to call my mom.”
Having only left the state for a short time to learn some life lessons (and yes, one of those was on mother’s day weekend – but I really must save that for my memoirs) once I returned, found a job, got married and settled down a bit, I spent a ton of time with my mom. So did my children.
I could fill a book with the experiences we had, the meals we prepared, and experiments we tried. Yes, I remember many good times. Since she has been gone, I also recall the many heartaches I must have caused her. How I wish I could back and apologize for them.
Some were major; some were seemingly small. Only now do I feel those pains deep in my heart. She was always there for me. When she died, I felt (feel) loneliness I cannot explain. Mom listened to me pour out my heart, swear, vent, shout and cry. In the years before she passed away, I tried to call her every day thanks to my best friend from college days, Karen. She told me once that she called her mom every day on the way to work. What a great idea. Sometimes it was only for a short time; other times it was the total distance.
My only point with this outpouring is if you still have a chance to talk to your mom, do it. I have never missed anything so much in my life. It’s kind of like not having the one person in your life that you knew loved you unconditionally. I hope you feel that from your mother.
So, in line with my Mother’s Day podcast, here is a list of things you can consider for Mother’s Day gifts. Small tokens of appreciation. Although, ultimately, it’s time you spend with her that counts.
Gifts for the Foodie Mom on Mother’s Day
Listen to the May 9 podcast on Main Street at PrairiePublicRadio.org
Sue B. Balcom
Writing, or maybe talking, comes naturally to me and under the guidance of a great newspaper editor I have acquired skills that led me to author four books.